My daughter informed me yesterday afternoon that Bananaman has moved in and will be sleeping in her room. Two minutes later she told me to turn around and look at his, "banana star." No way I was looking at that. I plucked up the courage later on in the afternoon to have a look, ince she had promised that it had nothing to do with him pulling his pants down or anything. Thankfully it was just this -:
Which was very VERY comforting considering all I could picture was a distorted banana-nightmare that looks an awful lot like this Peter Griffin chocolate-whoopsie gif. I feel like I've dodged a bullet there. Still she insisted on me wearing it around the house so that Bananaman could find me - which gave me a modicum of insight into how Jews felt in late 1930s Germany. She completely went off on one about Bananaman living with us after presenting me with this poster she made. I would show you the other side which has the message, "Bananaman - please come and live with me" on it, but it's written in pencil and you can't really see it. So instead you get this instead.
Pretty clever of her to save all that blue ink on his suit by using blue paper. Although to be honest that does look more like a fat bloke at Halloween party claiming to be in a Bananman costume. She attached it to the refrigerator and dangled a yellow fuzzy bollock over it that she made as a craft earlier in the day. Obviously she doesn't think it's a bollock - but frankly after the banana star incident my mind was fixated on Bananaman's nether regions. I bet he's uncircumcised. You'd feel let down if he was.
But anyway - you might think I'm employing an element of hyperbole with regards how absolutely nuts she's gone. Amusingly I told her she'd literally, "gone bananas" and she corrected me with, "no Daddy - it's gone nuts - that's what my teacher says." Nice work school. But back to the point - I am not exaggerating at all. How mental for Bananaman is she? Well - she did make a techno song about Bananaman on her keyboard, recorded it, and then performed a violent dance to it that caused epileptic convulsions like she was watching a Japanese Manga cartoon. Don't believe me?
Anyway she better get over this quick before this blog becomes some naff tribute website to crap British cartoons littered with troubling phallic symbols.