Wednesday, May 9, 2012


Today ended up being quite odd. 

Earlier my daughter explained to me The Rules Of Lightning. I thought I'd seen some flash by, but I guess not as it didn't happen again. My daughter assured me it was lightning - which she can detect (and no one else can) because she has her shirt on backwards. Which she did. She then held a Furby up to window and told me that she now understood The Rules. They are as follows -:

- All lightning stops at a Stop sign.This is why my daughter has never been struck by it because she doesn't have to, what with being English and the signs being American.
- If you see lightning you can't stand up.
- Lightning turns some people into a cat. Fantastically it's always the same cat and only one person at a time in the whole world can be it at a given time.
- Lightning does not wear sunglasses.
- Lightning also does not like to eat granola bars. It does like chocolate milk.
- Lightning is made from, "beams of electric."
- Sometimes lightning pretends to be a balloon. Upon seeking clarification from me she assures me it never, ever pretends to be a baboon. After further investigation it also does not pretend to be a bassoon, Vidal Sassoon or Mr. Spoon from Button Moon.

Later on my daughter completely destroyed the premise of an episode of Sid The Science Kid. Which was that dogs are inherently different from people - which can be proven by the fact that they can scratch their own ears with their feet.  My daughter found this stupid because - as she demonstrated - she can do that too. And therefore must either be a dog, or have one hidden inside her (shudder...).

After this my camera battery ran out. Which was mortifying because my kids then came up with a game where my son hides all of his trains in his underpants and my daughter tries to vacuum the lumps out with a Dirt Devil. The two of them found this possibly the most fun either of them have ever had. If I had video of this then I would already have something to show everyone on my kid's wedding day. Sadly I didn't. Which actually might be a good thing considering a quick Google search of, "vacuum pants" led to a very unsavory story about a 94 year old man, sexual indecency, a vacuum cleaner and several kids. Which was unpleasant to breezily read whilst also hearing my son laughing and a Dirt Devil humming away.

Me being me though I might get them to do it again later once the battery has charged up.

No comments:

Post a Comment