Saturday, December 15, 2012

Owl Of Scorn

Daughter: Drinking tea is hard because you have to hold a cup like a crab.

I wasn't going to write anything today. I was busy doing other things. But I thought I should at least mention why this blog moved. Firstly the name it was hosted on was awful. It was a juvenile joke from years back based around a forum named I had until recently. Basically I picked the name of a disease - an unfashionable one with connotations that some people find amusing - that made Googling it annoying. Because I'd become known as that name on a forum, I picked that as the name of the URL for this blog. I KNEW at the time that was stupid and childish but did it anyway. Because I was just that risque and hilarious. Anyhoo - you could say I didn't just grow tired of that silliness but I grew up out of it. That's not who I am. To put it dramatically - Herpes Is Dead. And I'm very happy about that.

Secondly the traffic over the last month rose considerably. And I mean four or five-fold on some days. Mostly that appeared to be genuine readership. But annoyingly I was also getting spammed to death. A lot was stat websites and those sites that look to see if you're content is original or stolen (as if anyone else would write this silliness?). Some was from odd Eastern European sites that I wouldn't click on if you paid me to. But a few posts in particular (for whatever congruence of reasons) would get spam-comments so frequently that I could spend an annoying portion of the day deleting them. After speaking with a few others they said that you can change your URL and shake that off. That frankly makes no sense to me - but since moving over I've had not one occurrence. And worse - the routes and types of people getting here was awful. Just nasty, evil horrible stuff that made me ill. I reveled in the amusement of the lighter jokey stuff. But seriously - very sick, very frightening people were looking up awfulness and getting to me. I don't want that kind of creep in my families' life - even via this route. And while I'm sad that some people will see the, "Blog Has Been Removed" warning at the old URL and not give it a Google to double-check, I was pretty much a day or so away from packing it in just for the annoyance and creepiness of that. And again - I'm tenuously hoping to shake the nastiness off.

Thirdly I've changed. I'm still an idiot. And I'm still the same guy that wrote all that silly stuff. But I'm also not. I ended up going through some old entries a little while back and thought some was funny - but that some didn't make me feel good about having written it. And then I heard from a few old friends who ONLY know me via what I'd written here and maybe Facebook. And that character was a bit of a dick. That's all they know of me for the last 2 years. Which feels quite hollow actually - especially as I'm not thinking about life the same way. Not to sound like "one of those people" but rediscovering my faith is playing a huge part. So I want to sort of demarcate my life into an old and new period. I hope that doesn't sound as precious or off-putting as I imagine it could.

Also it was like a reset. This blog started a long time ago with a handful of weird aims. One was to tell my wife about the day. One was to record things for my kids. One to maybe make a good go of it all and write something worth buying. One to record things and write stuff that I thought was funny. My wife doesn't have time to read this these days. Add all the silly things I'd made a note of - ideas and silliness that I'd ever taken but not published - pages and pages of them - were inadvertently deleted. Not sure how but the fact they were was oddly a big relief. When it was gone I didn't write for 3 days. As opposed to 3 posts a day at the time. That felt pretty good! So I had to start fresh. But more importantly I was already doing something else with that energy. All the original aims seem silly now. And I'm enjoying the reset very much. Except this post - this seems too twee.

And frankly I wasn't too happy with the idea of telling people - let alone my kids - "hey read this thing I wrote about us! It's on a blog named after a virulent STD!" It's also probably apparent that I write a lot less than I used to. I'm doing more with my son (he's that age) and using my reading/writing time on other things. Things I feel are more worthy. So I'll still do this. I enjoy it when I have some fun things to talk about. But I'll likely post less (watch me make a fool of myself there) and the content will still be similar but just not as dickish. I hope you like it when I do write.

And for that I give myself the Owl Of Scorn.


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